Pigeon death

We have a cat named Giles.

Giles is typical in that he comes to you when he is hungry and then sits in my spot on the bed for most of the day.

He also brings us the odd woodland creature. Sometimes your pet needs a pet...for a while at least until he challanges the creature to a very uneven fight to the death. Giles has yet to lose. He must have had training somewhere before we adopted him.

So this morning, per usual, Catherine comes into our room to get us up. At this point if we are both still in bed and Alex hasn't escaped to work at some un-Godly hour, there is a bit of an unspoken battle called: 'Who can pretend be asleep the longest.'

This morning I knew I was going to win after I heard Catherine say:

'Daddy, there is a poo in the hallway'

And Alex replied 'I am sure it isn't a poo.'

And Catherine insisted 'It IS a poo daddy, come and see.'

And Alex stalled 'Do you think mommy or I pooed in the hallway last night?' The answer was an emphatic 'NOOOOOO daddy! Come and SEEEEEEEEE!'

All this time, I am under the covers making sure to keep my breathing slow and steady ... and basically trying not to giggle.

So Alex gets up and this is what I hear:

'SEEEEEEE Daddy a poo!'

'That is not a poo Catherine, that is the remains of a pigeon.'

'Is it dead?'

'Yes.'

'How did it die?'

'Giles killed it.'

'Oh. I touched it.'

'Well then, please go wash your hands.'

'Ok.'

I am starting to think we need to get a bouncer for the cat flap.

And then there was a bit of commotion with a plastic bag and Alex swearing at the pigeon remains I assume, as I was still practising my deep breathing and remembering the dream I had about Bon Jovi before all this excitement happened.

I am leaving off the background soundtrack that is Stuart screaming for someone to come and get him...as that is pretty much a given every morning and so I have learned to tune it out.

At this point I think I definitely need to post this on Facebook as it is just too good not to share. Out from under the covers, I reach for my phone. Once the phone is in hand, the 'I am still sleeping game' is pretty much over. It doesn't take Alex long to come and stand over me looking pretty put out and says in a loving tone only I can hear 'Get up.'

Turns out Giles left us the head, a wing and the carcass and that Alex listened to him eat it for about an hour starting at 4am which means that he is way better than I am at the 'pretending to be asleep' game.

Maybe I need to get some tips.